Hugging, Chili, and Demon Fish

-=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-<* A07: Fernwood Pub *>--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-

          The common room of the Fernwood Pub dominates the inn, spacious and airy because of the high, vaulted ceiling. Ornately carved beams of dark, polished wood form a lattice overhead, supporting the arched roof two storeys above the floor. To the right of the double-door entry is a spiral staircase, winding upwards to a balcony that rings and overlooks the main area. Large windows at this level grant an excellent view of the river to the west and colorful market stalls to the north and east. An air of coziness is salvaged by keeping the pub dimly lit; parchment-shrouded mana lanterns hang at intervals from the base of the balcony, nestled amongst lush, magically propagated ivy and ferns that grow over this false demi-ceiling and the struts that support it.

          The bar is sleek and simple, comprised of meticulously polished black lacquer. Tables are set under the darker niches formed by the balcony floor as well as on the balcony itself. A few are deliberately sized to accommodate halflings and gnomes, but the majority are meant for human-sized individuals. A large common table is on the main floor, set before a semi-circular stage situated against the western wall. Beside it, with pipes mounted upon the wall and running up past the balcony and almost to the ceiling, is a refurbished pipe organ made to look like the one lost when the Fernwood was destroyed during the Merkabah Siege.

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 Azog            A huge male orc with long black hair in a topknot.    1m   2h
 Findrago        A young gypsy man with a neatly trimmed black beard.  0s   45s
 Bennet          Tall cowboy, starting towards grey.                   1m   55m
 Rayne           Short half-elf, with a dragon tattoo on her neck.     12m  2h
 Vuk             Gobber Gentry in fine exotic hide clothing and Top ha 5m   3d
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An Artifice-driven Boggle Board
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Out <O>                   
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Rayne smiles a bit, "you mis-understood." she says to Bennet, "well perhaps I mis spoke." she taps her fingers on the table and she looks over vuk "well I am not a pirate anymore." she says as if that were obvious. "Ive come a fair way into land to leave that life..." she looks then to Bennet "just Boatmaker and mapmaker now yes?"

Azog nods at what Vuk says. "Though it matters whether you are a maker of boats for pirates, or a maker of boats who operates outside the law and doesn't pay taxes." He grunts to Bennet, but doesn't actually seem to have an issue either way, though he says, "Actual piracy is dealt with severely." He nods gravely as Rayne corrects herself. "That is good."

Vuk moves to sip his cup of tea..it's a mug, and half Brandy. It's still partially tea, and thus respectable. "She seems to think I saved her life by bringing fell undead to... what ever. Knees." Undead Anatomy and death is a bit puzzling. "Damned fine showing of steel and fire it was though. Damned fine." He says and excludes how he was infact, hell and far away from the undead.

Findrago wanders into the pub, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes and trying to coax the effects of last night's drinking from his head. "Morning, everyone!" he calls as he passes through the door, signaling to the bartender that the hair of the dog is in order. He plops down into a chair, kicks his feet up on another one, and waits for his booze... er, breakfast to arrive.

Bennet frowns mildly, but shrugs. "Can't say as approve of priracy, but can't speak too harsh. Most folks got stuff in their past that wern't the best idea. What sorta boats ya make?" He galnces to Findrago with a raised brow.

Azog seems satisfied, himself, about the lack of currrent piracy. He eyes Vuk, and says, "If you have fought and defeated undead, then that is good." He offers a shout of greeting to Findrago, who he recalls from the previous evening. Apparently Azog is a morning person.

Vuk has to sort of look at Bennet for guidance, it isn't often any one shows like, honest appreciation to Bennet. "Dancing?" He asks and gives a wary look at Rayne. The only sort of dancing he saw was in unsavoury places, with a lack of clothing, and a rather angry gent throwing people out.

Findrago waves back to Azog, then nods politely to the barmaid as his drink arrives - whatever it is, it's pale and light brown and fizzing slightly. "Who's dancing?" he asks before taking a sip of the concoction. "And why is someone dancing while fighting undead?"

Multiple conversations are not his strong point this early in the morning. Especially before breakfast.

Bennet shrugs back to the goblin. He's a cowboy and a priest, neither one exactly known for their insight to the minds of the female species. Turning back to the example in question, he shrugs. "Can't say as have a current need. But iffen that changes, reckon I know who ta talk to." Glancing to Findrago, he shrugs. "Swordsman, I reckon. One of them 'Dance of the Blades' sorta things. Or maybe it's 'Dance of Death'? Remember some bard singing 'bout it once, can't say as recall the details."

Rayne nods her head to what Bennet says and she takes a small spoon of soup to her lips. Her eyes flicker and she looks over the new arrival, quieting for a moment as she chews on her bread. The bard just listens to the conversations at hand.

Azog ehs about a dance of blades? "Really? Why would you dance with a blade? Blades are for fighting!" He shrugs to Findrago and says, "I don't think anyone's dancing now." He looks around, just in case. "This isn't that sort of place." He eyes Rayne again. "So, you are a Skald?" A tribal thing, but, approximately a bard.

Vuk doesn't look less confused, so he looks towards Findrago. "No one is Dancing!" He says to agree with Azog and then looks at Rayne when Azog asks her a question. "She was playing drums." He offers.

Findrago takes another sip of his drink. "A shame," he says simply. "Nothing in the world wrong with dancing. Quite fond of it myself."

Bennet shakes his heads a moment to Azog. "Is a dancing sort of fight. Or maybe a fighting sort of dance... seen couple of those... but think mostly is one of them... metaphor things. Fellas so skilled in fightin, makes it look like a dance. Ain't quite the same, but neither way do ya wanna mess up yer footwork."

Rayne nods her head to Azog "aye Skald." her eyes move to Findrago and she laughs "I was offering a performance for Vuk, as he saved me from a nasty encounter with the undead." she says softly. Before she listens to Bennet "I would love to learn a fighting dance." she says quietly.

Aurala has arrived.

Azog squints at Bennet, but finally nods when footwork is mentioned. "Ah, yes. Keeping your feet in a good position for balance and shifting your weight to use your power against your enemy is important in fighting. I did not know it was important in dancing also." He nods sagely to Rayne, having worked that part out finally. "So you tell the stories of heroes? That is good."

Vuk is still rather puzzled by being given a dance for saving people. Naive Gobber is Naive? "My good Lady! It is both my calling and chosen duty to aid those in need! Besides, I'm an Adventurer Extradionare." He says and again doffs his tophat, but no smacking into Azog this time. Brekkie is finished, and he pushes his empty plate to the middle of the table and leans over to ask Azog in a confiding tone. 'What type of dance does she mean?'

Findrago peers at Vuk. "My friend," he says. "My good, good friend. When a lady offers to thank you for saving her, it may be seen as exceptionally rude to deny her that. I'm sure your chivalry is noted, but for her sake and yours, /let/ /her/ /thank/ /you/."

The door opens abruptly, almost slamming, though not really the intention of the giant woman that makes her way into the pub. The giantborn lass tries to be careful with the door as she turns to close it and then turn back to the room. She shifts her earthbreaker back over her shoulder as she glances around the room.

Rayne smiles to Findrago "it is ok, he said he dose not want a thank you.." she shrugs and then takes another spoonful of her soup. The Bard is quiet as she looks amongst the others at her table.

Azog replies to Vuk, "I am not sure exactly how the dancing part works. Skalds will sing of battles and deeds of heroes, so if she will skald for you, it may be that she will create a tribute for your battle? Movement may be done to emphasize the action of the moment, perhaps?" He looks up as Aurala arrives, and calls out a greeting, "Hello!" and invites her over to join the crowd with a sweeping gesture.

Findrago shrugs his shoulders and takes a long drink of his breakfast. "His loss, I suppose," he says. "My Aunt Esmeralda thanked my Uncle Pietro for saving her once, and he graciously accepted it. She cooked him his favorite meal for a week. Poor man died of food poisoning a few days later, rest his weary soul." He rubs his chin, his contradiction dawning on him. "Okay, perhaps in some situations it's wiser to turn it down. But I'm sure you're a far better dancer than Aunt Esmeralda was a cook."

Vuk gives a wide eyed star at Findrago as he tells a story of dying thanks to being thanked. Findrago is doing nothing to improve Vuk's beliefs about dancing, but Azog's theory sounds better. "Well! Perhaps I will accept a dance some time later!" Then the door is almost taken away and he joins Azog in greetings..except he stands on the bench and jumps up and down and waves both his hands. "Greetings! Well Met! Merry Tidings!"

Findrago waves at Aurala as well. "Now, there's a woman who knows how to make an entrance," he says, raising his glass in salute to her.

Rayne smiles then as the conversation at the table dies down and she stands with her empty bowl, she tucks her bread into her backpack and she looks to Vuk, turning the bard hugs him.. "Thank you again." she says before letting him loose and turning for the door.

Azog nods gravely as Vuk chooses to consider the bard's tribute. His eyes widen as the tribute seems to be a hug, which he at first mistakes for a wrestling advance. But it seems not to be that. He looks perplexed. So, situation: normal.

Gak! Vuk hadn't expected that either..not unless the hug turns into some one trying to hug him! "Ahem Yes Ahem..well.." Stammering, Vuk's cheerful nature just suffered an overload!

A rakish grin spreads across Findrago's face. "Remind me to save her one day."

Azog gives Findrago a puzzled look, but he shrugs. He eats his breakfast quietly while Vuk recovers. Vuk only seems to recover when the Elf is well and gone and coughs a bit. "Well! I'm sure it was..that's normal, correct?" He asks Findrago and Azog.

Findrago nods. "Oh, completely normal. Sometimes a kiss is involved, too. Nothing to worry about."

Azog can only offer a shrug as to the normality. "I think some people are starved for affection, so they give it out more freely than normal in hopes that it is returned. I do not know why or what to do about it. When this is done by women, no one seems to complain, but men who do this are put in prison."

Vuk looks oddly at Azog when he says prison. "Most peculiar! If women can do it, then men should be able to! Perhaps we can ask Mikilos about this! He's a wise elf." Blame Elves.

Findrago kicks his feet off the chair, and leans forward. "Now, let me tell you two..." he says, lowering his voice conspiratorily. "They /should/. But there's a difference." He looks back and forth to see if anyone was eavesdropping. "And I have no idea at all what it is. I just know there is one."

Azog nods slowly to Vuk about asking Mikilos. "That may be for the best. I do not understand this city very much at all." He nods to Findrago, "There is a difference, yes. Perhaps it is one of the fundamental differences between men and women and we must just accept it?"

Vuk has to wonder if Findrago sort of misses how women look different or not, but he won't voice it. "I thought the difference was rather obvious." He points out helpfully and readjusts his top hat.

Findrago laughs. "Oh, it is very obvious. But the kissing thing - that's one of the not-so-obvious differences. There are lots of those."

Azog agrees. "There are many differences. We must live with them. Or strike them down. But striking down is frowned on in this city, so..."

Vuk narrows his eyes a bit at Azog when he talks about just hitting people! "We don't need to around striking down the peasentry! Rather unbecoming!"

Findrago shakes his head. "Nonono. No striking down the peasantry. That's just so... wrong. I believe he means striking down, or removing, the rules that govern these differences."

Azog shrugs to Vuk and eyes Findrago. "I will do that also. But I meant that I will strike down those who challenge me. But, I am finding here in the city it is only suitable to match an offense with like, rather than to match offense with arms. If someone makes chili at me, I am required to make chili back at him rather than cut him down as he deserves." Azog has issues with chili.

Vuk has to squeeze his eyes shut and open them again. "I do not believe chili is commonly considered an offense..it's a rather wonderful meal. Full of meat and spicy peppers, wonderful for winter I do say!" Vuk loves cooking!

"Chili?" Findrago wonders how this conversation steered itself from kissing to social norms to chili. "Is... is chili considered an offense in your eyes?" He thinks for a moment. "Then again, it /is/ what did in Uncle Pietro..."

Azog shakes his head to Vuk, "I like chili also. But, for you to speak so, you have not had some of the chili they make here. It burns the mouth, and has no flavor, only pain and malice. It is a thing of the Dragon of Death," he refers to Thul, perhaps alluding to heat in his breath. He nods to Findrago about his uncle. "You see now."

Vuk cocks his head a bit, he has not had chili like that. "Well! Perhaps it is a style of another region and we need to adopt it." he says and rubs his hands together a bit. "A spot of molasses and brown sugar wouldn't go amiss!"

Findrago makes a warding sign. "Poor Uncle Pietro..." he breathes. "I never knew it was such a horrible way to go."

Azog says to Vuk, "It is a style of Alexandria, and you would need a bucket of sugar to dilute the burn of what orcs and dwarves make to fight each other." He gives Findrago a sympathetic grimace. "He must have made her very angry."

Vuk isn't sure how chilli is lethal yet, but Findrago is a crazy Gypsy. Mighta been a curse. "I will have to attempt to discern this for my self." Vuk surprisingly, can cook, actually cook!

Findrago shakes his head. "He made her very happy. She made him bad chili."

Azog can only shrug to Findrago. "Perhaps it was an error, then? Perhaps it is a thing that is easy to do wrong. I have heard that there is a fish in the Jade Islands that is prepared, and if done incorrectly, will kill you. Perhaps this is the same."

Vuk isn't really sure where the Jade Islands are, but toxic fish? Not all that unusual, there's frogs that can kill you, and the three step snake! "You know, thats what we should all do. Lets go dig a hole in the ice, do a spot of ice fishing? Find Zippo, he can burn the hole for us."

Findrago says, "I thought ice fishing involved /not/ melting the thing you'd be standing on."

Azog shakes his head to Findrago, "If the ice is solid enough, a fire on top of it won't have a significant effect. But it's generally proper to cut the hole with an awl so as not to crack the mass of ice you're standing on." Then he thinks about Zippo. "Maybe ice fishing is a bad idea."

See Vuk thinks Zippo would be good for ice fishing, because he thinks some one who can probably blow up giant fish is a good plan. "Well! He could help us either way! I'm sure he has a device to cut the hole, and if we get cold he can just start a fire!"

Findrago drains the last of his drink. "See, I've worked with Zippo before. He's talented in the ways of death rays and fire, but fishing might involve his science causing pain and ice and unidentifiable chunks of fish over a large area. We might have to fish the traditional way, were we to do that."

Azog nods to Findrago. He only knows traditional ways in any event. "That is one of the things I do in winter here when not much is going on, or when I am weary of the city."

Vuk lightly strokes his chin, this is truthful words. "I suppose we could take away his gizmos and see if he'd enjoy fishing in a normal fashion.."

Findrago laughs. "I think he'd invent new ones halfway through the trip."

Azog considers Vuk's suggestion, but says, "I do not think he will like that. He is ... yes, like that."

Vuk has exclusively found Zippo to be amusing when he's yelling science and then fiery death. "Well! I say -you- two can do normal fishing, me and Zippo will employ goblin ingenuity in the form of explosives."

Findrago says, "And I shall be happy to watch that from a suitably safe distance." He thinks for a second. "Or just have one of the survivors tell me how it went."

Azog winces at Vuk, but says, "That is well and good as long as I'm not standing on the ice that he's fireballing." He nods to Findrago about a suitably safe distance. "Perhaps a quarter mile." He shakes his head. "If there are survivors."

Vuk waves a hand dismissively at the two of them. "It is a perfectly safe plan. We push Zippo out on the ice with a stick, immediately begin running the other way."

Findrago shakes his head. "I can already see him swearing about the demon fish being resistant to science."

Azog is about to reply to Vuk, but finally relents. "That may be effective."

Vuk snickers quietly and adjusts his monocole. "Yes, I have to admit he would. Then again, with how things seem to go when ever Zippo is involved, there's probably a true demon fish."

Findrago stares wistfully at the bottom of his glass. "Hrm. Empty. And yes, he most likely would. But I have full confidence in his ability to try and incinerate it regardless."

Azog says sincerely, "If there is a demon fish, then I am willing to fight it. I have fought underwater before. It is difficult, but with the right magic, it may be done. It may be better to fight it on land, though." Fiendish dire sharks? "Hrm. What if it is resistant to fire?"

Vuk coughs a bit when Azog mentions it being resistant to fire. "Zippo will just yell science and try it again." he suggests.

Findrago points to Vuk. "Exactly. Eventually, I believe he'd actually get it right."

Azog thinks about this. "Yes, but doing it again isn't aways effective. Sometimes it is."

Vuk shakes his head a bit at them both. "Well, this requires an experiment. Shall we find a demon fish to see how Zippo handles it?"

Findrago chuckles. "Not quite sure there's a shop around that just sells such things. 'Why yes, I'd like a loaf of bread, three apples, and oh yes, that demon fish over there looks quite nice.'"

Azog says to Vuk, "If there is such a thing, I am willing to fight it, myself. But ..." he pauses, eyes Findrago. "Perhaps this is what they put in the chili?"

Vuk isn't going to comment on finding one, because some how, Sandy tying him to a rope and dunking him into dire shark infested water comes to mind. "I'll make a note to ask Mikilos!" As for the Chilli he shrugs a bit. "Fish isn't what you use for chilli..dire boar.."

Findrago seems to be getting more and more perturbed that Aunt Esmeralda may have actually poisoned Uncle Pietro with demon-fish infused chili. "Right, you use boar, sometimes beef. Fish chili? Maybe only if you have no access to boars or cows and live in a fishing village. And are starving."

Azog shakes his head to Vuk and Finidrago. "In this city, they'll put anything in chili. Fiendish dire shark is probably too tame for them here. I am sure they use horrible things never meant to be eaten." Though jalapenos would be in that category, if Azog knew what they were.

Vuk shakes his head, he's with Findrago on this one. "Fish don't go in chili, they go into chowders, along with lovely niblets of corn, and cream. Oh, and butter." Vuk probably dumps bacon cracklings in too if he had a say.

Findrago's stomach growls. "All this talk of food is making me hungry for something that isn't chili," he says, glancing down at his offending gut. "Ooh. Venison is actually quite nice in it, though. Especially the lean kind." He looks to Vuk. "In chili, not chowder. Venison chowder sounds weird."

Azog seems to think anything awful is appropriate for chili. "We shall see. If I hear of a demon shark, I will let everyone know, and we will kill it, and see how much pain it can cause." He seems to think that is the main point of chili. He had a bad experience with his first Alexandrian chili. "Though, I should go now and be about my tasks."

Vuk will doff his hat at the two of them, he suspects he should make him self scarce before he ends up in a maze and falling out of the ceiling. See, Sandy sense is tingling, she's some where in the city. "Well! Let us hope we get a good spot of hunting on a dire shark then! We'll make it into a grand chowder and compare it with Venison Chilli!"

Findrago stands up and tosses a few copper onto the table. "I look forward to it, gentlemen. Until then," he says, sweeping into a bow, then waving and heading out the door.