The Book of Kinkade

It's been a while since the last time you visited the temple. It's a bit of a treck, into the back rooms where the valuable and/or dangerous things are kept. To the room set aside for this particular purpose. The only thing in it is a table for the book to rest upon. Just that and yourselves. The book is silent and ordinary-seeming at first glance, but then... Powerful magical artifacts are rarely what they seem to be. You better than most know that.

It's been a bit since last they visited the wizard-become-relic, and Magpie has not spent that time unwisely. ...Well, not *all* of it, anyway. For awhile, the sorceress tried hard to work out what she would most be in need of if reduced to nothing but a head... and packed accordingly.

"Heyyy, Professor Kinkade!" Magpie singsongs as she opens the door, hefting a bulging and many-angled bag over one shoulder. "I hope we're not interrupting a nap?"

Dolan, on the other hand, has had approximately three thousand things to think about in the intervening space, and has managed to spend almost no time at all on this topic. He trails behind Magpie, having left weapons and armor behind and instead opted for warm wool shirts, the outer one dyed a rich harvest gold, and leather trousers and boots. He seems to have skipped the trappings of his position in the temple.

"You're going to do most of the talking, my friend, I've barely thought about this," he tells Magpie, stretching carefully in the way of one aching.

Auranar is the last in, looking a touch nervous and she seems to relax slightly as Dolan admits that he hasn't put much thought into the questioning of the wizard they'd come to see. "I've been rather busy... so I haven't had time to come up with much of a plan myself." She has the grace to look embarrassed. More loudly she addresses the book. "Greetings sir! We've come again to bring you tidings and in the hopes that you might be able to aid us."

The book, ordinary though it seems to be, has a rather hefty title. 'Malice of Infinity' has a certain ring to it after all. After a brief silence there's a harumph, and then the book speaks up. "What do you want? Have you brought my body? I'd like to be put properly back if you don't mind. I miss having arms."

"Your body is a good bit heavier than the book you're in," Dolan points out from behind the ladies, his grin cheeky. "It's easier to bring you to the body, than the body to you, but I'll bet that being the brilliant wizard you are, you realized that already. Anyway, yeah, the Guild found your body and did as you asked, so we can get to it. Thing is, though, we'd hate to have this happen a second time, so we'd kind of like to know who did this to you. We think we can find out if we just knew about your other works."

"And given the weather's turned *insane* lately, I thought it'd be a good idea to bring you some bribes to pass the time. Until the tunnels in the snow can finish getting dug people-height, anyway," Magpie says, thumping the sack onto the floor; mostly books, by the sound of it, though some metallic clinking as well.

"I don't *really* know your taste in literature, so I got a selection. And uh, I *also* don't know what your spellcasting situation is like in there, so um... Also got some puzzles and mage-toys too, just in case. If not, well... I know some people *really* good at reading out loud."

Bribery, indeed...

Auranar opens her mouth and then closes it. She has a thoughtful expression on her face however, and yet she ends up saying nothing useful. She wishes that she'd thought to grab a practical gift like books to read or mage toys. Hopefully she'll be able to redeem herself with a timely suggestion or question.

"Wait. What 'happened to me'? To my body I mean. It should be reposing. In a meditative state while I'm in this blasted book. Did someone do something to my body while I wasn't inside it?" He sounds a bit panicked, enough so that he levies off a rather irritable comment to Magpie. "Don't try to distract me with books and knick-knacks! What happened?"

"Your body was found dead in the Arcanist's Guild under suspicious circumstances," Dolan explains, crossing his arms across his chest. "That's what we want to help you figure out." He looks over at Magpie, to see if she can add more. "What was that dumb name who signed the book out, Magpie?"

"Buttfor Poupin, Esquire," Magpie grumbles, *still* nursing a research assistant's grudge against all who dare to make light of scholarly procedure. "Haven't seen *that* name as a joke in the lending rolls often, but it was an obvious joke name."

"It's clear that someone didn't want your book found easily, and that they wanted you... physically out of the way." Auranar explains to the book, feeling somewhat awkward. How often does one have to explain to someone that they're dead? "So if you could tell us what you were looking into, we can maybe figure out why they would go through all this trouble."

GAME: Auranar rolls Diplomacy: (17)+3: 20
GAME: Dolan rolls diplomacy: (1)+13: 14 (EPIC FAIL)
GAME: Magpie rolls diplomacy: (1)+6: 7 (EPIC FAIL)
GAME: Dolan rolls diplomacy: (18)+13: 31
GAME: Magpie rolls diplomacy: (18)+6: 24

The wizard is silent a long moment. "Dead?" It's a quiet word, hollow and full of loss. "I... I guess I won't be having arms again."

There's another long silence, and its clear that the man is digesting the fact that he's dead. "I guess... This means that my research was a success... It's possible for a wizard to pass on his knowledge to future generations..." He makes an odd coughing sound. "Well, I intend to thwart whoever it was that killed me! The only question is... How do I know that you're not demons trying to trick me into giving away my secrets?!?"

"...You're kept in a room in the Temple of Daeus?" Magpie hazards, eyebrows rising. "I mean, of all the places demons *could* infiltrate, I'm 99.99999 percent sure that any demon trying to get in here to trick you would be pate smeared on the ceiling before they got through the antechamber?"

That question hits Dolan like an iron rebar across the face, and he is left blinking. "I - guess you don't have eyes, do you," he says finally, clearly still floundering. "I'm one of the Sunlord's Redeemers. I hunt demons. It's what I do." The whole idea that he might be accused of being a demon quite obviously metaphorically hits him blindside and leaves him floundering.

Auranar can understand the desire to make sure they're not demons, but she has an idea. It might not be brilliant, but it's an idea. "It's you we have to convince, so what can we do to convince you? You can't see that we're not demons or demon-possessed, or where we are, so is there some magic or something else that would convince you that we are who we say we are?"

"It'd be easy enough to pretend that this is the temple of Daeus." The wizard grumbles, but he sounds half-convinced by the argument just the same. One can almost imagine him nodding. "You're right. I don't have eyes, but I still have some tricks up my sleeves! If one of you picks me up, I should be able to see through your eyes. I mean I could be some evil book waiting to devour your soul! But if you expect me to take a risk, then you must be able to take the risk also!"

Dolan's still left blinking by the turn of the conversation. "Yeah. Look, maybe I shouldn't do it. Looking through my eyes takes some getting used to, and if the book does do something weird, I'm the best one to shut you two down." He taps his ruined right cheek with the golden gem set into it meaningfully. "Don't mind doing it, but Master Kinkade might."

"And I mean, it's fair!" Magpie chimes in. "'Don't ask anyone to do something you wouldn't do' is kinda reasonable, *especially* in cases like this, so... Yeah I'll do it. If only cos you two are *way* better at mitigating any nonsense that'll happen. Remember the argument we had last time? I gotchu, Professor. But uh... Kinda low to the ground, just to warn you."

Auranar nods firmly at Dolan's words. The last thing she'd want was to try and wrestle the man if he were to suddenly be possessed! "I'd do it Magpie... but if he does turn out to be evil I have a spell that might be useful in bringing you back to yourself." She seems nervous at the thought of them needing such magic, and she is. She moves a bit closer to the door, wanting to be between it and Magpie should something go awry. She smiles reassuringly at her friend. "We'll be here Magpie. Either way."

"Sounds like you have it decided!" The book declares seriously and not without a touch of excitement. It doesn't move even an inch, but one can sense the anticipation coming from it. Not a wholly comforting thing really. "Come along then, no need to dally!"

"Yep!" Magpie approaches the pedestal... pauses, sighs, and moves to fetch a step-stool from a corner of the room. Muttering dire imprecations against a city designed by talls, for talls, she scooooots the stool into place, clambers atop it, and grabs hold of the book.

The moment her hands make contact, her head jerks to one side, face scrunching up. "Well that's... new," she murmurs, blinking rapidly. "Sorry, just gotta get used to that... okay! Aaaaaand... ta-da!"

At this, Magpie hops around on the stool, tracking her eyes up Dolan from toes to hair, then Auranar. "Professor Kinkade, allow me to introduce your avengers!"

Dolan automatically watches closely Magpie's every move, tracking her carefully as she grabs the book. And - nothing untoward, looks like. Still, he's at least a little cautious, waiting, studying her, far less relaxed than he was a minute ago. The stylized dragon comes out of his shirts to hang openly on his front.

Like Dolan, Auranar is on edge as Magpie takes up the book. She has her hands ready to cast the spell should Magpie even try to move toward the door. She doesn't, though her initial reaction does cause Auranar to look at Magpie suspiciously. "Are you alright Magpie?"

The voice of Albus Kinkade does not come out of Magpie - disconcerting as that might have been - but rather the book still. "Ahhh! Yes! I can see! You look like what I expected. Oh! One of you is an elf. Lovely lass. Wish I had a mirror so that I could see who you are. My you ARE short. But that's alright. You can put the book down milady. I see the holy symbol of Daeus and there are few enough demons that could bear the touch of such. I do not doubt further."

"Yeah illusions aren't really my specialty or I'd show you," Magpie says, bobbing her head. Turning in place, she sets the book back on its pedestal. "And uh... so if you can't see except out someone's eyes, um... Hm."

Turning back to look at Dolan, the gnome's brow furrows. "What's the Temple's policy on non-malicious souls trapped in objects? Because this guy could *really use some socializing.*"

The question gets Magpie a look of confusion from Dolan, a look, admittedly, that is only readable on the mobile half of his face. He scratches at the nape of his neck uncertainly. "I don't know that they have a strong policy on it, but the Professor isn't exactly there because he wants to be, so I don't see them taking a great shine to it. The Mourners are the ones most likely to have kittens."

His hand drops. "Guess I don't mind if you want to see Magpie," he offers hesitantly. "Looking out my eyes takes some getting used to, though. So anyway - I'll be straight about what I'm looking for. There's a demon named Jal'goroth who's gotten himself a cult of werewolves that have been harassing the city." He rubs with a gloved hand at the back of the opposite shoulder, loosening the muscles. "I'm trying to track this bastard down. I was hoping you could help."

Auranar winces at the thought of what the mourners might think of this wizard trapped in a book. She has... thoughts on the subject herself, but nothing that she wants to share with the wizard himself. Instead she holds her peace and lets Dolan ask his questions, that's why they're here in any case.

"Ah you're a kind lady." The wizard says, sounding mildly embarrassed. "They'll not allow someone to do what you did. It's too risky. I understand."

He hefts a sigh. "I owe you all for what you've done so far, and if you intend to hunt down those that killed me; I'll owe you a fair bit more. So here." There's a glimmer from the book, and a statuette of a lovely woman pushes out of it. It stands firmly atop the book, innocuous and wooden. "It's one of the bindings on the Beast's prison. Jal'goroth wants them all badly, to free him for his master. If you give them to those that worship the deities they belong to, they will grant powerful visions to the ones that hold them. This one belongs to Eluna. So find an Elunanite that you trust and give it to them."

There's a brief pause. "I must warn you that this is a dangerous endeavor. Jal'goroth is powerful, and has many followers. Mortal and immortal alike. Furthermore... he has one of the bindings in his possession. This much he bragged of to me. Fool that I was, I thought I could gain information from him. Likely he's the reason I'm dead now."

"I mean if you want," Magpie says to Dolan with a shrug, clambering off the stool and pulling it out of the way, should the Inquisitor want to pick the book up.

Then, book dispense statue! "I... wow okay! Wow, how many of those things *are* there-- no stupid question. How many are left to *get,* I wonder?"

The statues. Clear and unequivocal recognition writes itself across Dolan's features. "Yeah, I'm holding two, but neither one is Daeus'. I know whose they are, though. That's Eluna's?" He nods to the statue, and to Magpie, but shakes his head at the offer. "They'll make your dreams damned interesting. There's thirteen, I'd bet. Seven of Light and seven of Dark, minus the Nightmare, who didn't make one." A crooked grin acknowledges why. "We'd better figure out who's got what."

"Yes. It might be time to gather them together and find out who has what and... I guess redistribute? I haven't dealt with one of these things directly myself, but..." Auranar looks at the statuette. "I worship Eluna. I could keep this one for a time and see... if it helps."

"Be careful bringing the objects together. Jal'gorath may well try to attack if all of them are in a location so easy to take them from. Also, do not easily give away the anchors to those that worship the dark gods. Better to keep those in the hands of those who can be trusted." Albus offers these words of advice simply.

"Yeah. There's a few who don't worship the dark gods that probably shouldn't hold onto them either," Dolan agrees grimly. "Auranar," he starts, turning his head fully towards her, and then his body. "There's one of them that someone got ahold of and attuned by accident. What was his name - do you two think you can figure out who that is and find out which one they've got?" He shakes his head. "I'm told it's safe, but I've never met the man. Be happier if I knew."

"If you're up for it, Auranar, I'd trust you," Magpie says, turning to face the elf. "And it's not like you could get much *more* invested in this whole mess. Just..."

Turning back to face the book, Magpie looks a bit... crushed. "Professor, I... If they won't let me take you back to Arcanist's, and like, get you set for tenure for *literally forever*... Would it be okay if I visited, d'you think? It's just... you don't deserve *anything* that happened to you, and it seems horribly cruel to just... let you actually gather dust in storage."

Shaking her head, the gnome draws in a deep breath, nodding to Dolan. "Yeah, I could probably. D'you have a description, or anything, narrow it down a little bit?"

Auranar nods to Dolan immediately. "I'd be happy to look into who has the statue." She nods to Magpie, but doesn't add to the sentiment displayed there. She has... concerns. However she doesn't let the statue just sit there either. She picks it up, looking at it with trepidation before stowing it into her dress. She just hopes that the temple doesn't stop her for trying to take it.

"You're very kind milady. I'd be happy to have your company whenever you are available to give it." Albus sounds a touch emotional at the thought of company. "Admittedly it has been very... lonely, not knowing when or even if anyone was going to return and tell me what happened to... me. Gathering dust in storage hardly sounds like a fate I'd enjoy."

"Yeah, sorry about that." Dolan's shoulders hunch, and he manages somehow to look bashful. "A couple of demons got loose in the city, and I got distracted trying to hunt them down. Took me a while to come back to this. I can see if they'll let it go back to the Arcanist's Guild." He shakes his head at Magpie and Auranar. "No, I don't know. All I know is every time I've asked about it I've been told I shouldn't worry about it and it's in good hands. Oh, um - what was the other book you wrote, that wasn't this one?" He turns his head again to the book, facing it fully.

"Perfect," Magpie says when Dolan speaks of letting Albus be released. "But wait... What did you say before, about the Guild doing what he asked with the body? Cos if it's still around, couldn't *something* be done?"

Subsiding, she listens seriously to Dolan's report on the missing figurine-holder, and nods. "Well it's not ideal, but yeah, we can probably do some digging and see what we find. Maybe scrape up the fund to hire out a scrying?"

"We'll figure it out. Someone knows who he is and I'll figure it out." Auranar's eyes are set and determined. "That's what I'm good at after all! Research!" Here she offers a wide grin to her companions.

"_A Compilation of the Eternal_ is the book that you're looking for my good man!" Albus answers Dolan easily, clearly pleased to have been asked. "It's not a complete compilation of course, but it does have some interesting tidbits in it. You might ask the school if they'll give you my research papers! You might find them useful."

"A compilation of the eternal," Dolan repeats, in the way of one committing a thing to remember. "I'll be sure to check, although Magpie, don't you work at the guild sometimes?" Now he turns fully to Magpie, repositioning himself so that both ladies and the book are on his left. "It sounds like you've been at it with this Jal'goroth before."

"Yeah it's my day job, I'm an adjunct research assistant." Magpie seems... less than proud of her title. "Basically I get to hunt up reference books for students to research for their theses, and honestly I'd love the job a *whole lot more* if people weren't doing stupid studies on frog-boiling and booger trajectories and I waste *entire days* before their professor yells at them. But, meals and a bed, whaddaya gonna do."

Clearing her throat, she seems to sense her oversharing instinct had kicked in, and continues more relevantly; "If Barrister Poupin hasn't checked that one out too, I'll definitely hunt it down. By now I know the stacks like the back of my ha--" Trailing off, she peers at the back of her hand, then tries to scrape off an inkstain. "--when'd that get there. *Someone's* hand, anyway."

Auranar chuckles at Magpie's commentary, reaching forward and touching the other woman gently on the shoulder. "I know that feeling. I've been doing so much research into the subject of demons and devils that it feels like I should know every book ever written on them by now. Yet there's always another!" She laughs again and looks at the book before them more seriously. "We'll do what we can for you Master Kinkade."

"Not sure there is much you _can_ do for me, but visit often." Offers the wizard somewhat bemoanfully. "My body can not recover without my soul and my soul is trapped here in this book. With my body damaged I'm not sure that there is a way that my soul can be put back. Perhaps the Vardaman's might know?" He doesn't sound terribly hopeful. "Either way, I wish you all the best. You've been very kind to an old mage who ought to have known better."

-End