The Laughing Thief
Log Info
- Title: The Laughing Thief
- Emitter: Telamon
- Characters: Ravenstongue, Telamon
- Place: Bridge over the Tornmawr
- Summary: Telamon and Ravenstongue are walking along a bridge over the Tornmawr when a Lucht couple are accosted by a thief. The woman's purse is thrown into the river by the thief as he flees. Telamon dives down into the water to retrieve it, and Ravenstongue catches the thief with a laughing spell.
-=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=- Dramatis Personae =--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=- Ravenstongue 5'0" 99 Lb Half-Elf Female Short half-elf girl with violet eyes and black hair. Telamon 5'6" 140 Lb Half-Elf Male A platinum-blond half-sil man with dancing dark eyes -=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-
Bridge over the Tornmawr, early afternoon
It's a hot, hot day in Alexandria. The joke is that even the fire elementals are rethinking their life choices. Certainly the sun is beating down, and there's more than a few people looking longingly at the cool waters of the river as they cross the bridge.
A pair of half-elves walk arm in arm across it, a familiar sight to some. Telamon, dressed in a loose-fitting tunic and trousers over boots with a broad-brimmed hat, peers up at the sky. "The iced-cream sales must be going through the roof these days. The merchants are recruiting anyone who can cast cantrips to help charge the coolers." He smiles at Cor'lana. "We'll have to pick some up at some point."
A little ways ahead of them, a thin fellow has been trailing after a halfling couple toting a large knapsack. Suddenly, the man breaks into a sprint, and grabs for the knapsack, trying to snatch it away!
Some men don't look good in hats, and it's with this in mind that Cor'lana's looking up at Telamon in admiration--she refuses to wear most hats on account of them "making her face look tiny," even though she's definitely small compared to most half-elves--and is dressed hopefully to match, wearing a white halter-top dress that goes just a bit past her knees.
Damn, how come he looks good in everything? is the thought Cor'lana has--up until the moment that the man goes for the knapsack. Cor'lana blinks--but her first reaction is to not go for a spell, but rather shout, "Hey! Thief!" Good work, adventurer.
Telamon can't help but feel a little self-conscious in the hat, but at least it doesn't look like that silly one that made him look like a mushroom. And it does keep the glare down. At Lana's smile, he gives her a squeeze. "We could probably get you a light hooded cape, maybe. Something like that capelet you used to wear but in cotton, so it's less heavy..."
When Lana calls out the thief, Tel blinks, looking around before his eyes lock onto the thin man struggling with the halfling pair. "Stop right there!" he shouts. "Watchman!" The word is repeated by several people in turn.
It's clear the thief didn't expect the lucht to be so stubborn -- despite the lucht man's small size his arms are corded with solid muscle, and his wife is trying to grab the thief's ankles. The tactic's actually not dissimilar from one used by khazadi to fight giants, and the thief realizes he's short on time. With a curse, he yanks the bag away, and tosses it off the bridge, before trying to flee.
GAME: Ravenstongue casts Hideous Laughter/Persistent. Caster Level: 8 DC: 21 GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20-1: (6)+-1: 5
Cor'lana finally remembers her wits, and she goes into action with the thief, although she does take a moment to quietly appreciate that the lucht man's not skipping arm day. She lifts her hand up and murmurs an incantation seldom used--but it's certainly effective in the right circumstance.
Such as this one.
The thief goes down laughing like he's at a showing of Street P, the edgy puppet comedy at the Theatre District, and Cor'lana bellows, "I got him! He's the man on the ground laughing!" in case any members of the guard are running by.
The thief is rolling around, his eyes in a wild panic even as peals of laughter roll out of him. It's clear he can't take any action, and the lucht man is coming towards him with blood in his eye. Perhaps fortunately, that's when the watch lands on the man, three burly fellows like slabs of beef on the hoof.
Telamon, for his part, hurries forward. "Are you two all right? We saw the whole thing, Lana and I."
The lucht woman looks up at the half-sil, her face worried. "Yes, but... that miserable longshanked bastard, that's our store earnings for the week, and he tossed it right into the deep part of the river!" She points at where the bag vanished into the water, then perhaps realizes Tel is kind of 'longshanked'. "Er... sorry, dearie, I'm a little worked up."
Tel waves it off. "You've had a bit of a start..." His eyes go to the water. "Maybe... did you see exactly where the bag went in? It looked heavy, so I doubt it'll drift far in the current."
The lucht woman looks confused. "Well... yes. Surely you're not going to go swimming for it, though!"
Cor'lana has never been accused of being longshanked and is certainly about to not be--but she looks over at Telamon as he asks the question. And she smiles. "It's okay, ma'am," she says knowingly to the woman. "My fiance's a very good swimmer."
Well, okay. That one's a bit of a fib. But the woman doesn't need to know the truth.
The half-elven man gives his fiancee a grin and a wink, before smiling at the lucht woman. "Something like that. I'm glad my lady here can keep you company -- she's much more charming and prettier than me." His eyes twinkle, gentle light in them.
The watch are hauling the still-giggling thief away, as one of the trio of 'slabs' ambles over to take depositions, first from the lucht man. While that's happening, Tel casually pulls off his tunic, handing it to Lana before stepping out of his boots. Then he unbuckles his hip pack, handing that to her as well. "If the watchman asks, tell him I'll be back in a few minutes if he needs me."
And then with that, Telamon casually clambers over the side of the bridge, and drops into the river below, vanishing beneath the water.
"Sure thing, darling," Cor'lana says with a grin to Telamon--she can't help it once she sees him sans tunic. She'll happily hold his doffed clothes and pack if it means she gets to look at his back. His back, not his backside.
No, she's totally looking at that, too. "He's dreamy, isn't he?" she finds herself muttering to the Lucht woman. "Of course, he goes straight into danger without thinking about it, but that's what we do as adventurers."
The lucht woman giggles. "A bit tall for me, miss, but I can definitely see why he distracts you so. Oh, where are my manners? I'm Olivia Brassbell, and this is my husband, Tarley. Adventurers, you say? They say Alexandria can be dangerous, but this is the only trouble we've had in ten years!" She sighs. "It's the refugees, gods bless them. I'm not blaming them but all manner of folk are taking advantage of them -- either to rob them, or to use them as cover."
The big guard -- evidently a giantborn, judging from his stature and features -- finishes taking Tarley's statement and walks over with a pencil and book in hand. "Your husband has made his statement," the guard rumbles in a basso profundo. "Ma'am," he directs to Lana, "please state what spell you used to incapacitate the thief. This may be discussed at trial." From the way he says it, it sounds like he's reciting something.
Meanwhile, Telamon is batting away some fish in annoyance as he dives downwards. After a minute, he burbles his way through an incantation or two, and starts to move again, a light balanced on one finger.
"We were all newcomers to Alexandria once," Cor'lana says with a sad smile. "I just am sad that so many had to come here like this, and, like you said, are used like this."
She looks over to the guard and nods. Thankfully, she has plenty of experience not making giantborn feel like odd people out due to their size and stature, and she doesn't gape at him like some people might. "Sure," she says. "I used a spell called hideous laughter. It, well--it makes someone laugh very hard, like it's the funniest joke in the world. Great for incapacitating someone. My name is Cor'lana Lupecyll."
Then she points down into the water. "And the gentleman down there trying to get the woman's purse is my fiance, Telamon Atlon. He's fine, I assure you." She's very calm about the whole thing.
It's odd, this whole not needing to breathe thing. Telamon hasn't really used it before now. His hair flows around his head, curious fish goggle at him, and the soft light he bears helps push back the gloom this deep. Having reached the bottom, he begins to search around patiently for the bag. It can't have drifted too far...
Meanwhile, on the bridge, the giantborn guard patiently notates the spell and Cor'lana's name, as well as Telamon's, and their residence. "It is unlikely we will need further testimony, but the watch captains have been very specific about making sure details are recorded." The giantborn peers over the side. "...Are you sure he's all right?"
Olivia, too, is peering over the lip of the bridge. "...Has he even come up for air? I haven't seen him!" Tarley is trying to reassure her. "They're adventurers, darling. I'm sure he has a codpiece of water breathing or something like that."
Cor'lana just about chokes on her own air supply as Tarley makes the codpiece comment. She somehow manages to bite down on the laughter that desperately wants to crawl its way up from her depths. "He doesn't need to breathe," she clarifies, stating it matter-of-factly.
And just to sell it, she just slowly turns to the couple and smiles. "Telamon and I are sorcerers. He's blessed by the stars, and I inherited considerable arcane power." She doesn't mention the fey--people get a little cagey, for good reason, when they're mentioned. "Which is why we're adventurers. Have to put our powers and abilities to good use if we can help it."
There's a certain sense of pride in her voice. After all, that's Telamon down there, being the big hero of the hour.
All three give Cor'lana bemused stares, though the giantborn's expression is less 'you're kidding' and more 'oh, yeah, adventurers are weird'. Maybe he's been around more than a few of them before. Olivia and Tarley, on the other hand, kind of goggle at Lana a bit, before looking back at the water. Suddenly, Tarley points, "What's that?"
Beneath the water, a light can be seen. The water is also swirling a bit, churning, as suddenly Telamon's head pops above the waves. One hand is held over his head, holding the soaking-wet but still closed bag. "Hang on, I'm coming up!" His head dips down, and then suddenly there's a rushing sound as he launches from the water. Around his calves and ankles is a strange, indistinct shadow, like a ghostly wave, carrying him back up onto the bridge. "Bracing," he comments, raking his hair out of his face.
Cor'lana can't help but grin as he comes up onto the bridge. "There's my Tel," she says, and she gets to the work of helping him dry off with careful application of the prestidigitation cantrip. It probably looks bizarre and beyond the ken of normal folk like the lucht couple, but such is life for the half-elven sorcerers.
Once he's dry, Cor'lana hands him his goods back--although she seems almost sad for him to put the tunic back on. "Is the purse all in order? Would've been a shame if you want to all that effort and something was missing after all," she asks.
Telamon smiles a bit bashfully as Lana grins. "I think so, but you'd best check it." He nods to the watchman. "Telamon Atlon, at your service, sir." He hands the bag over to the lucht, as he comments, "It was pretty well closed up, but you may need a new one -- I don't think that leather's been treated for immersion."
As Telamon puts the tunic back on, he gives his statement to the guard as well, adding, "It wouldn't surprise me if that's been a 'drop' for stolen goods. I saw a few things down there that didn't look like the usual garbage you'd find on a riverbed. It might be worth the watch's time to dredge the river if they get the chance."
While Olivia and Tarley go through the soaked bag, the giantborn guard makes notes. "We probably won't have the opportunity in the near future, but I'll pass it along." He closes the book, as the two lucht nod happily. "Everything's here! Thank you, sirs and ma'am!"
Cor'lana just smiles, looping her arm around Telamon's. "Wasn't a problem at all. Have a good day!" she tells the Lucht couple with a polite wave.
She goes walking with Telamon, seemingly content to just let the lucht couple go about their day with no more strange interruptions (i.e. laughing thieves and adventurers that don't need to breathe). Cor'lana looks up at Telamon and smiles, violet eyes twinkling. "Look at you, being all majestic coming out of the water," she says. "Of course, they were worried about you--until I politely informed them that you don't need to breathe. Then they were just befuddled."
Once things are wrapped up, the walk continues, the sun drying out any last traces of water on Telamon. "I didn't think I looked majestic," he says a bit self-consciously. "I just... was trying to do the right thing. I mean..." He pauses, blushing. "...are you teasing me again, Lana?" he asks with a small smile.
Crossing the bridge, he pauses to watch a couple wagons go past. "Sometimes I feel like I'm just... pretending, I guess. I want to help people, and sometimes I wonder if I'm doing enough."
Cor'lana sticks her tongue out at Telamon in response to the question, snickering. "I'm admiring you, Tel," she says. "Both in terms of how good you looked doing that, and in the effort. You really helped them back there."
She pauses with him, watching the wagons go by--but she does the thing that likely made Telamon fall for her to begin with. She takes the opportunity, stands up on the tips of her toes, and kisses him on the lips, wrapping her arms around him. For that brief moment, it's just the two of them in the middle of the world somewhere.
And then she draws back, giving him a playful smile. "We're doing enough, just by existing and trying to help," she says. "We may not be able to figure out what's going on right this moment and stop it, but we're enough."
Telamon's arms go around Lana reflexively as she wraps her arms around him in turn. It does make him forget everything he was talking about there. The self-doubt, the worry, that sometimes surfaces behind his confidence. When he comes up for air, he blinks. "...Now you've completely distracted me, love." He smiles back at her. "But I think I needed it. Thank you."
Giving her a squeeze, he continues, "Tradespeople here can't afford to lose a week's take-home. But it can be expensive to hire guards, even for minor things like this." He rubs his chin. "I'm glad we were there to stop the thief, and get their earnings back. Sometimes the light has to get carried into humble places as well as grand ones."
Cor'lana can't help but smile, the sparkle in her eyes a clear indication of that feytouched mischief. "You do the same for me when I get lost in the depths of my fears and sorrows," she says, "so I wouldn't be a very good wife if I didn't return the favor." Nevermind the fact she's not technically his wife yet, but she does say the word in a playful way that's designed to get him to blush again--or at the very least, point out the technicality.
She reaches up and pats his face gently. "Precisely," she says. "It wasn't all that long ago that we were hardly one step above mundane, everyday people. Now we're adventurers, and getting pretty good at it."
Telamon's cheeks do turn pink a bit, but he keeps his composure. "We face it all together," he says with a smile. Switching to Sylvan, "Queen of my heart, as always you soothe the troubled waters in my spirit." As the wagons finally pass by, the two begin to walk again, arm in arm, a matching set.
"It's so strange. I mean, you're right, of course. I.." He pauses, stopping. "Wow. This is... this is where I entered into Alexandria, last Rhaltaas. I was leading Raspberry along, and we ran into Aryia, right about... there." He points. "Gods, I was just ambling along, not a care in the world."
Cor'lana smiles at Telamon. "Really? Aryia was the first person you met?" she asks. "That's so funny. Especially considering how she called us becoming a couple. Gosh, and Raspberry--that poor creature, too, carrying all of your burdens."
She leans a little into Telamon as they pause. "Of course, then some time later, we met, and that was that for the both of us. The hands of fate in motion, as they say." Is that what they say?
Telamon nods and grins. "She was a little intimidating, even then. I mean, she still is, even if she's a good friend. But I always figured she could see through people easily, which is why I didn't try and hedge about what I was doing here."
He chuckles at the mention of Raspberry. "I wasn't carrying that much. I think Raspberry was more put out by the unintended side trip we made." He blushes again. "See, I misread the directions and they gave me the wrong map, and we wound up almost going around Alexandria rather than into it..."
Cor'lana laughs. "Well, you're not the navigator when we go off on adventures for a reason," she says. "Except for in the realm of dreaming--although, I suppose we've lucked out in having Rafael for a guide the past couple of times. Not to mention that nice Isaak fellow."
She leans into Telamon again, and takes the moment of pause to stand up on her tiptoes and kiss him again--this time, on the cheek. "Thankfully, we know the way home. I could use a cuddle on the couch... and maybe some more of that cheesecake." She'd made it again due to how positive of a reception she'd gotten since the night celebrating their anniversary, and it appears that cuddles and cheesecake are set to be in Telamon's future if he agrees to it.
Telamon chuckles softly. "Agreed. I'd rather someone else be the guide, to be honest, no matter how familiar the realm of dreams has become for us. I don't much fancy getting lost there either!" He hugs her to him, as she kisses his cheek, and he nuzzles her warmly.
After a few moments, he grins down at her. "Well now, you know I don't object to either of those things. The cheesecake is nice, but the cuddles are definitely better." He reaches up and playfully touches her cheek in turn. "Let's go home, love. We've made the world a little brighter place, and that's reason enough to be happy."