Thrax
Tenebrae - Tuesday, September 18, 2012, 5:36 PM
-=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-<* A06: Ox-Strength Tavern *>--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-
The Ox-Strength Ale Tavern is known for being one of the most dangerous dives in the city. Frequented by the worst sailors, mercenaries, thugs and looters, the place is hardly the prettiest nor the tidiest of taverns, though--of late, that has been changing. Locals claim the once foul-tasting food "No longer burns the stomach--as much, anyways." Plates show signs of repair instead of cracks, though the still infamous odor of old beer and stale sweat insists on hanging about the place, and the smell of brine is near-constant.
What used to be bricked-up windows have been somewhat opened. Heavy bars let in a reluctant breeze and prevent the clanging of heads against glass (which seems nearly afraid to exist). Bloodstains adorn both the nearby walls and the bricks themselves from thrown patrons and fists.
The lights are dim, a few oil lamps hung from hooks in the splintered ceiling beams. A smattering of tables, scratched and carved into by many a blade, dot the expanse of the floor. Most of the tables are arranged in a wide circle to give plenty of room in the center of the bar for hasty escapes or the routine bar-brawl or fight. A worn-out steam piped stove sometimes provides warmth to the tavern. Occasionally an aging dog of some mangy breed or another can be seen sleeping near the stove or by the bar itself. Overhead the fireplace is a tribute to Rada, the patron of fishermen and rivermen everywhere.
-=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-- Contents --=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-
It's a pretty good day, despite the light rain that's going on outside. It's quite cool as well, and fall businesses are booming for the moment. As is the locals in the Ox strength tavern. it's never really quiet in this bar, but lots of guys are having a good time. However, off in one of the corners of the tavern, a few guys are having a better time than the rest....trying to tell jokes and laughing loudly before they can finish the joke.....the entire group does that is.
The end of another long day; Younger steps into the Ox Strength. He is covered in dust and cobwebs. He glances around, his cigar hanging from his mouth. A pillar of smoke rises from it only to get picked up in the breezes of the room and dissipate.
He heads over toward the bar, coin already pressed between two fingers. He does glance toward those laughing, looking for familiar faces.
Wherever there is laughter, there is Jibbom. It's like a beacon that guides him to where he needs to be. The halfling swishes into the tavern, pausing by the entrance to banish the rain from his robes with a quick application of magic. "Have no fear, good tavern patrons!" He calls out. "Steel Von Ironblood, Bane of the Night, is here to partake in your merriment!"
Mikilos glances up from his bowl of extra spicey soup (which is to say, a bowl of spice with a little water added) and raises a hand in greeting to Jibbom, a nod of greeting to Younger as well. Typically, a poncy elf type wouldn't do well in this enviroment, but the ability to kill with a look (or so the rumor goes) helps to keep the locals in line.
The laughter continues, bringing one of them to tears. However, one of them grabs the pitcher and heads up towards the bar, bumping into mikilos once up there. 'hey Barkeep! Need another pitcher here!" he then smiles towards the elf. "Sorry, Elf." he then coughs at the smoke Younger produces. "And a round of drinks for everyone!" he yells so everyone can hear. Including the group with him. Seems they're all in good spirits.
Ooh! A round of drinks for everyone. Jibbom is part of everyone. Or so he's been led to believe. "Many thanks, good sir!" He says with a broad grin before dashing to the bar to claim his entirely unearned beverage. Along the way he spots Mikilos, who is greeted with a wide smile. "And greetings to you, Book Noser! I didn't know you frequented this establishment... my thanks again for your fine craftsmanship. The pieces you delivered are sublime."
Cesran comes in from the outside as he hears the laughter and the call for the round of drinks. He gives a smile as he goes to order a drink and he nods a greeting to those that he knows. "Hello Mikilos." He gives a friendly wave to the elf.
A head is nodded at the jubilant fellow; "Thanks." He rumbles, stuffing his coin away. He still comes away with an ale. He doesn't apologize about the smoke, after all. Instead, he casts another glance at the gregarious gentlemen. Then his attention turns to Jibbom, whom he eyes quietly for just a moment. Finally, he takes a long drink of his ale. It custs through the dust on his upper lip, leaving foam in its place. He wipes his face with the back of one hand.
Mikilos glances at the bump, but lets it slide, offerng a grin to Jibbom and a hand up onto the barstools a bit too tall for the average halfling. "My pleasure, glad you like them. Is a nice enough place, under it all, and am friends with the management. Not the owners." Important distinction.
Jibbom accepts the help onto the barstool, getting settled and grinning jovially. "Superb work. I may very well have more work for you once I am paid certain monies I am owed." He glances at the group of smoking, laughing fellows before he looks back at the wizard. "People seem to be in good spirits. What's the occcasion?"
The fellow put up a rather large bag of coins on the bar for the bartender to count through. "That should cover it, my friend." Then his friends call out to him. "Hey! Get back here quick or Thrax is gonna grease you again!" "THRAX AIN'T EVEN HERE! How's he gonna grease me again? he did it often enough in his cave out there!" He says getting the pitcher and heading back to the table. Sure enough, as soon as the pitcher touches the table, he slips and falls on his butt, but the pitcher doesn't even wobble from the table. This brings a lot of finger pointing, THEN uproarious laughter from the men.
Mikilos shrugs, taking a spoonful of spice soup from his steel bowl. Lesser bowls cannot contain the spiciness of the extra spicy soup. "I've no idea. They were here when I came in, have been getting progressively louder as the time passes." He frowns mildly at the sudden fall, but shrugs again.
Cesran hmms as he sees some of the stew and he orders some, "Yes extra spicy please. Let's see what this city considers spicy." He gets his drink as he waits for his stew and he listens to the conversation going on around the bar. He watches as the man falls and he starts to laugh along with the others.
Inspired by the example of the wizard duo, Jibbom's thoughts turn to dinner. "Hrm. Would you recommend the soup, then?" He tries to get the barkeep's attention. "Do you have demon meat? Or anything deep fried?" Jibbom must maintain his adventurer's physique, after all. The raucous bunch is eyed again, curiosity obvious.
Mikilos shrugs. "It's fairly good if you like spicy. Ground habenero seed with chili powder. And some onion, I think. It's no Naga Pepper, but will clear the sinus." Casting fireballs is mostly about a proper diet. "The fried ox is also quite good, I hear." He ponders a moment. "Don't think are any demon on the menu, but the rat stew might count. Half certain those things are part infernal."
The entire group stops laughing as Jibbom says 'Demon meat', and they just turn to him when he says 'deep fried', before they turn back to each other, as one, then explode into laughter! One falls out of his chair, another pitches over backwards, and a third is pounding on the table from laughing so hard.
Jibbom either doesn't realize or doesn't care that he's become the butt of the joke here. Objecting to laughter for any reason is probably tantamount to sacrilege to a Tarienite. Besides, there are more important considerations at the moment. "Fried oxen it is! I'll take that with a pint of your finest halfling lager, my good barkeep."
Cesran smiles, "Sounds good to me." He gets his bowl and starts to eat. "You know Jibbom if you want to try some real delicacies you should find the Wargolem named Munch. He's tasted just about everything. I'm sure he knows where all the food is like that." He gets his drink and moves over to sit by Mikilos.
By now, one of the laughing guys has slowled his laughter, and ambled his way over to Jibbom, callping his hand on the halfling's shoulder. "hey Buddy." he wipes a tear from his eye. "You should tell that deep fried infernal joke to Thrax. I'm sure he'll howl over it." He says before making his way back over towards his table.
<OOC> Mikilos is tempted to roll k/local or some such; who is Thrax?
<OOC> Savannah says, "go ahead and roll it if you want."
GAME: Mikilos rolls knowledge/local: (19)+10: 29 GAME: Cesran rolls knowledge/local: (4)+11: 15
Mikilos frowns thoughtfully. "Not so sure on that. Think that golem just consumes whatever happens across, without any real regard to details. No sure, I havn't interacted with it much." He glances towards the loud table again, pondering.
Jibbom grins as he takes his beer, having a swig. "Thanks! If I can remember which part was the joke, I'll be sure to... who is this Thrax fellow, anyways? Some manner of local jokesmith?"
Cesran hmms, "I've been on a few adventures with him, nothing lately. Apparently he likes to eat all kinds of stuff and can taste it or at least he says he can taste it." He continues to eat his stew, "Mmm very good, but needs a little kick to it."
The man looks back towards Jibbom and smiles. "you could say that, shorty. You should go and meet him. head for the wayfarer's station, and look for a hill to the northwest. And go to him in good humor, he won't disappoint."
Mikilos frowns a moment at Cesran, until realizing he means the golem, not Thrax. Softly, to Jibbom, he imparts "I've heard of Thrax, some sort of comic, but no real details. If you do plan to visit, I'd like to go along and meet the fellow."
Jibbom ponders as he has a long slow sip of his lager. "Hrm. And here I was, thinking that I already knew every joketeller and comedian of note in this fair city... it seems that Steel Von Ironblood, Bane of the Night, shall have to investigate this so-called 'Thrax'." He shoots Mikilos a grin. "If the book noser wishes to accompany me on this journey, I would welcome the company."
Cesran continues to eat and he finishes up his stew. He hmms, "I've heard he was a comic too, although not much more than that." He finishes off his drink and stands up, "Sounds like something that could be worth investigating."
<OOC> Savannah says, "Away we go then."
Mikilos shrugs and gathers up his pack, leaving a coin on the bartop in tip.
Jibbom finishes his lager hastily, leaves a tip, and follows out.
-=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-<* H01: Kultari Road *>--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-
From east to west, north to south, the Alexandrosian countryside weaves over hill, valley, and farmland. Kultari Road meanders through it at a comfortable pace. The roadside is lined with curbstones, their surfaces comfortably flat and warm, with sand pressed inbetween. At times construction meanders into dirt, and numerous pathways branch off here and there to different farmsteads.
Along this stretch is a waystation. Over its door is a carved marker with dual symbols of Gilead and Tarien, the patrons of travel and the meeting of wilderness-and-civilization, respectively. Not large, the waystation rests a comfortable ways from the main avenue, with a place for a firepit out front.
Towards the south, the sky and landscape darkens. The Felwood lies there, and an occasional screech from inhuman lungs may be heard.
Towards the east, the shining City of Alexandria.
-=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=--=-
The directions are fairly accurate and quick. You get close to the waystation, and ask for where the group came from, and they point you in the right direction. Into the woods. SO that's where you go really. In a north westlerly direction into the woods. Thankfully, the woods aren't too dense.
Jibbom often wanders into the woods when he's been drinking, so this is nothing new. He leads the way, merry spirites going nowhere. "So, Book Noser One and Book Noser Two. You seem like you've heard something about this Thrax fellow. What's the story?"
Mikilos doesn't often drink, and seldom ends up in the woods. Instead, he checks his blade and components are handy. Unlikely to be needed, by why risk it? "There isn't a story, near as I know,just a few vauge rumors. Rather why I'm curious, seems would be -something-."
Cesran hmms softly, "What was that Bronze Lan Tinbutt?" He asks curiously at Jibbom. "I haven't heard much about other than a name? I'd like to find out more about him as well."
<OOC> Savannah says, "Okie guys.....Reflex saves. XD" GAME: Jibbom rolls reflex: (2)+7: 9 <OOC> Jibbom uses halfling luck to reroll! GAME: Jibbom rolls reflex: (19)+7: 26 GAME: Cesran rolls reflex: (15)+5: 20
The ground shakes underneath the three of you, and while Mikilos stays back, the both of you are nearly caught in the crumbling ground. It doesn't take long before a cave opens in front of the three of you, one leading down into a very very dark passage.
<OOC> Savannah says, "perception checks now." GAME: Cesran rolls perception: (12)+2: 14 GAME: Jibbom rolls perception: (16)+4: 20 GAME: Mikilos rolls perception: (12)+3: 15
Jibbom wobbles and shakes, but his innate luckiness seems to keep him from tumbling during the rumble. "Huh. That was... odd." He turns to Cesran and shrugs. "Did you hear something... odd, just now?" He draws his staff, striking it upon the ground and causing it to glow with a sudden bright light. He holds it towards the opening of the cave, peering curiously.
GAME: Jibbom casts Light.
Mikilos hesitates, but isn't quite so susprised as he might be. "Somehow, I doubt Thrax is just a regular funnyman."
Cesran hmms and he shakes his head a little bit, "Sorry I was a bit too worried about not falling in the hole." He hmms as he peers into it and he has his hand near his spell component pouch, "Obviously not."
The cave entrance get quite dark only a few feet in, and the light spell doesn't help much, since it only goes out so far. The light DOES help a little bit though, keep them from hurting themselves......for now.
<OOC> Savannah says, "Jibbom, reflex save." GAME: Jibbom rolls reflex: (5)+7: 12
Jibbom peers for a moment, then shrugs. "Ah well. Must've been my imagination. Come, associates! We shall sally forth!" He charges towards the cave entrance, lighted staff held aloft.
And just as Jibbom charges further into the cave entrace, he suddenly drops out of sight. For anyone that runs up to where Jibbom dissapeared can actually see his staff's light, and follow it. he's definitely not moving in a straight line, more like sliding on a water park slide......and picking up speed.
<OOC> Savannah says, "Mik, Ces....Spellcraft please." GAME: Cesran rolls spellcraft: (19)+17: 36 GAME: Mikilos rolls spellcraft: (17)+18: 35
And so, Jibbom hurtles at increasingly high speeds into the unknown darkness. What's the logical response? "Wheeeeee!" Probably not that.
<OOC> Savannah says, "All three of you know it's a grease spell."
Mikilos ponders a moment, shrugs, double checks his gear... and hops on the ride after Jibbom.
Cesran hmms as he goes into the cave. He draws up short as he sees the spell, "Well that's not good." He looks at Mikilos and he pauses a moment to at least cast mage armor on himself. Better safe than sorry.
GAME: Cesran casts Mage Armor. <OOC> Savannah says, "Perception checks. Jibbom with a -5....thanks to his 'WHEEEEEE'" GAME: Mikilos rolls perception: (12)+3: 15 GAME: Cesran rolls perception: (6)+2: 8 GAME: Jibbom rolls perception - 5: (5)+4+- 5: 9 Savannah pages: You can actually hear deep laughter....and it's coming from the direction you're going in.
Ormarr has arrived.
The slide isn't too horribly long, but.....at the end of the slide, you all hit something soft at the end. It's mud.
Well, that's unpleasant. But it doesn't seem to dampen Jibbom's good mood very much. He wobbles to his feet and waves his arms, magically cleansing as much of the mud from his rags as he can manage. "Well, that was fun!"
GAME: Jibbom casts Prestidigitation.
Mikilos moves swiftly out of the way at the bottom of the slide, having no desire to be run over by those behind. "Would have prefered feathers or something non-sticky, but a fair step up from spikes. Everyone caught up?"
Cesran gets up slowly and he frowns, "Better mud that something else." He goes to sniff it and make sure that it is mud. He wipes the mud off the best he can and he looks around. "Let's shed a little more light." He waves his hands and with a word of magic four lanterns appear and move out around him.
Jibbom hoists his now de-muddied staff aloft to try to add his own illumination to the area, squinting to peer into the darkness. "Now then... where are we?"
Mikilos shrugs mildly, peering around. "At the bottom of the cave's slide, a bit closer to our host. Beyound that, havn't the slightest idea."
The mud disappears a few seconds later on Jibbom, Mikilos and Cesran, only part of it from their own spells. Of course, the lights only go in so far, but the dancing lights also only go in so far as well. However, once they get themselves cleaned off, a deep echoing laugh can be heard from deeper in the cavern. Then a deep voice speaks out. "I should've known one of the wandering ones would've found my lair." The problem is....the voice is coming from above them.
Jibbom peers around the cavern curiously. "So... you must be the legendary funnyman we've been hearing about, eh?" He peers at the ceiling. "What's the deal here?"
Mikilos peers, his elven eyes a little more adept to the low light, but not quite enough. "Indeed? I'd have thought would be at least another before Ironblood." He glances towards the halfling. "It seems you set the presidence yet again."
Cesran looks up towards the celing and he hmms softly, "And exactly who's lair have we found?" He asks, "Why don't you come down in the light so we can meet face to face."
"Ironblood? Ah....you must be a follower of the coyote then. Then you are definitely welcome in here." The voice then snorts......and suddenly, torches flare to life all around the chamber, and it's a very large chamber. However, the source of the voice is the reson for why the chamber is quite large. All of the lights shine off of the scales.....
Of a very very large Brass Dragon.
"So I suppose your name is Sir Regenald Fondlebottom the magnificent bastard, hmm?" He says as a minor joke. "And you brought an Sildanyari with you. A pleasure as well. But you're a bit tall for a toothpick." He then looks to Cesran. "and a rather resourceful human." he then chuckles. "I couldn't fit enough of me into your light, Human." He then raises up again. "I am NilaThraxus, but you may call me Thrax." GAME: Cesran rolls knowledge/arcana: (20)+16: 36
Jibbom does seem somewhat surprised to see a massive dragon lumbering in his direction. Luckily, Jibbom is a master at taking surprising and alarming developments in stride. "You know, my grandpappy used to tell me that giant shiny talky lizards were generally nice folks, and giant dull talky lizards weren't." He waves his staff around to try to shed some more light on the beast. He looks at the wizards and shrugs. "Looks pretty shiny to me." He grins at the dragon. "Nice to meet you, Thraxxy. I am indeed Steel Von Ironblood, Bane of the Night, devoted follower of the Coyote and hero to the peoples of Alexandria. How's it going?"
Cesran blinks as the chamber lights up and he looks up at a gargantuan or larger brass dragon. He whistles softly and he nods politely to the brass dragon. "Thank you for the complement." He looks over towards Jibbom. "In general use metallic dragons are the good dragons although brass dragons as known for their pranks and jokes. It is said that a good brass prank takes at least three human generations to come to fruition, if not more."
Mikilos quirks a brow as their host is reveiled, again less susprised than he might be. "Mikilos Mithralla, Builder Arcane." he offers by way of introduction. "A pleasure to make your aquaintence Thrax." He glances sidelong at Cesran. "That's any prank, really. Not just draconic."
Cesran adds his name, "I am Cesran."
Thrax chuckles lightly at Cesran. "Lore on Brass Dragons is quite short. it's usually written in disappearing ink." However, He moves one claw towards the halfling. "Steel von Ironblood? A nice made up name, and a good name for legend and lore. What is your true name, little one? There WAS one Ironblood that found my chamber....And you are not an Oruch." His left claw then moves towards another side of the chamber. "And one of the Ironbloods decided that to gain glory to their clan by slaying a dragon...." His claw points to a pile of bones. "He didn't get the joke...."
Jibbom furrows his brow. "Another Ironblood? This will not stand. I shall have to find these usurpers in order to defend my good moniker." He shrugs, smile returning quickly enough. "Others know me as Jibbom Taribree, or simply 'The Jibbom'. Nice to meet you, Thraxxy. You been lairing here long? I'm surprised I didn't hear about it sooner."
Mikilos glances at the bones and tsks midly. "Does seem a dry fellow. Bit susprised I'd not heard of your presence either. Though if you've reason to stay incognito I'd understand."
Cesran looks towards the bones, "I take it he didn't die laughing then?" He nods, "So it would seem knowledge is quite elusive." He smiles, "So how can we be of service to you Thrax."
"I'd like to stay hidden, yes. There are far too many people looking to seek quick glory by slaying the mighty dragon in an epic battle. Those that come here for such a thing become boring and lunch, Mithralla." Thrax says dryly. "Most of my life, I had only one passion. Jokes and pranks. One of my best pranks is the one you came down. I heard the little one as he came down......and I consider it a success. I do fear I'm not much of a spellcaster, except when it comes to pranks." he then chuckles to Cesran. "Actually, if you have any new jokes, other than the last group that came in here. Racist and drunken jokes aren't to my taste." He then looks to Jibbom. "Taribree........I know your clan. It's.....well respected in my clutch."
Mikilos ponders a moment and shakes his head. "Sadly, I can't say as any jokes come to mind. Merely the death of my grandfather. You see, shortly before his passing grandma covered his backside with grease. After that, he went downhill rather quickly."
Jibbom grins chipperly at the dragon. "Oh, no worries. Steel Von Ironblood, Bane of the Night, only slays dragons who are mean. Not ones who tell amusing jokes. And, well, truth be told, they might've actually been drakes. They certainly weren't as talkative." He grins brighter. "My line has served the Coyote since the very beginning. Let's see, a joke worthy of a great big shiny lizard..." He strokes his chin. "... Well, the other day I was having a drink in town, and a captain walked in from the docks. Bizarrely, his ship's wheel had somehow become attached to his crotch. Alarmed, I pointed this out to him. He replied 'arrr, I know. It's been drivin' me nuts.'" Jibbom grins, awaiting the dragon's reaction.
Thrax apparently has a great sense of humor, for he begins to chuckle at Mikilos' joke, then laughs even harder at Jibbom's joke. "Those are wonderful jokes, yes." He then smiles. "I have a joke for you to return with." He then pauses. "Why does the ocean roar?"
Cesran nods, "It is truly a shame that those would come down here to hunt you and seek to slay you instead of focusing their energies on others more rewarding ends." He rubs his chin as he looks over at Jibbom's joke. Cesran is about to tell his, but he lets the dragon go first. He smirks, "You'd roar too if you had crabs on your bottom."
Mikilos ponders a moment but shakes his head, looking to the dragon expectantly, only to snort with amusement as Cesran gives his answer.
Jibbom looks about ready to offer his own answer, but laughs when Cesran gives his. "That's better than the one I'd heard to finish that setup."
Cesran continues with his joke, "Two wizards and a halfling met a blue dragon in a cave. The dragon said, "I am going to eat you. The first wizard said, "No, let's make a deal." The dragon said ,"O.K. what kind of deal?" The second wizard said, "If we each tell you something that we think you can't do, and you can do all of it, you may eat us." The dragon agreed to the deal. So the first wizard said, "Go to the barn, eat 16 cows,". The dragon did it. The second wizard said, "Drink half of the lake water." The dragon succeeded in doing this, also. The halfling burped, and said, "Catch it and paint it green." The two wizards and a halfling lived happily ever after!"
Thrax grins at Cesran. "Very good, Cesran." He says before stamping on the ground, and three green beams of light lance out towards jibbom's, Cesran's and Mikilos' left hands. "Those mark you as welcome guests in my lair. As long as you bring new jokes, stories, or stories of pranks, you shall be welcome in my lair. My only rules are that you do not tell anyone of my lair here, nor what I am....also that you do not take anything out of my lair without permission. You wouldn't want me to walk into your home and take your spellbooks, would you?"
Mikilos peers a moment. "I don't think you'd fit, but not particularly, no. Though does raise a question, so far as dry knowledge goes, I do know quite a few jokes. Presenting them well, however, is another skill. But shall see what I can do."